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Being home takes some getting used to!


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#1 toomanytoys84 ONLINE  

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Posted March 04, 2016 - 08:43 PM

As most of you know 2 years ago I took a promotion that required me to be out of town 5 days a week. It was a great opportunity and probably proved to be why I am still employed with the massive lay offs we have suffered in the last year.

I spent basically 2 years away from home only being home 4 evenings and 4 days a month. This was terrible as my son was born about 6 months into this and my daughter was 4 when I started. I missed a lot. And this was stressful on my marriage and many things.

But the last few weeks I was told to move my office to a place 20 minutes from my house. I am officially back home full time! I am so happy I get to see my family every day. But man has it taken some getting used to for all of us. My wife had a routine that didn't include me and I was kind of used to finishing working and getting to mess around all evening doing what I wanted.

But we are all adjusting well.
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#2 Cvans ONLINE  

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Posted March 04, 2016 - 10:29 PM

This should be a big help with the children. Best of luck to you and your family. 


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#3 camdigger ONLINE  

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Posted March 05, 2016 - 01:26 AM

It can be trying when you return to a more normal situation after a period of unconventional circumstances. Some marriages survive, many don't. Congratulations you and your Mrs seem to be successfully making the adjustments!
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#4 toomanytoys84 ONLINE  

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Posted March 05, 2016 - 09:27 AM

It can be trying when you return to a more normal situation after a period of unconventional circumstances. Some marriages survive, many don't. Congratulations you and your Mrs seem to be successfully making the adjustments!


I hope so! It certainly isn't easy!
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#5 MH81 ONLINE  

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Posted March 05, 2016 - 09:55 PM

When Karen's work schedule changed, it made us readjust
I hear you on the strain, but it'll all be worth it.
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#6 Alc ONLINE  

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Posted March 06, 2016 - 07:04 AM

Glad to hear your back so close to home . But I'm not glad to hear its been 2 years already ! I feel I remember you took that new job only a few months ago ! Times just buzzing by and we are all getting older quick !
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#7 camdigger ONLINE  

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Posted March 06, 2016 - 08:17 AM

I hope so! It certainly isn't easy!


Just between us, 1.) flowers and chocolates once in a while are far less $ than divorce lawyers fees. 2) changing the occasional diaper, feeding the odd bowl of pablum, participating in child care so Mom can get some alone time to shop or whatever alone will cost you less pride and humiliation than airing your dirty relationship laundry to a judge in a divorce court. Time invested in family time like this should have its own rewards. 3) parent hood can be fun and rewarding for the whole family or It can be reduced to something to be endured. The choice is yours. Choose wisely.

Don't mean to preach, just trying to share what has worked for us. In a few months we'll have been married 30 years.
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#8 LilysDad ONLINE  

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Posted March 06, 2016 - 08:38 AM

. My wife had a routine that didn't include me and I was kind of used to finishing working and getting to mess around all evening doing what I wanted.

But we are all adjusting well.

. . . . . and you get to be the boss every other weekend???


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#9 toomanytoys84 ONLINE  

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Posted March 07, 2016 - 10:13 AM

Glad to hear your back so close to home . But I'm not glad to hear its been 2 years already ! I feel I remember you took that new job only a few months ago ! Times just buzzing by and we are all getting older quick !

 

Scary that 2 years went that fast isn't it?  Seems like time goes faster and faster the more years I put behind me.

 

 

. . . . . and you get to be the boss every other weekend???

 

It was different on the weekends, as the weekends were always fun time.  Go here, go there, work around the house, play outside with the kids, ect.  But through the week, everyone getting to bed, homework, baths, bedtimes, kids sick, ect ect.  It's a mad house some nights. 

 

Plus me and my wife have two completely different ideas on how the house should be kept(we always have) I am more of the eat dinner, then scrub the kitchen, do dishes, ect.  My wife is more of the eat dinner, throw the plates in the sink and worry about it another day.  Tomorrow if you need that pan to cook something, well you gotta wash it.  Awhile I was away she let the house become a mess then spent all day Friday cleaning it before I got home.

So I got back into the habit of just cleaning it(and the rest of the house) the way I want, and not complaining(because it does no good)  I am kind of a neat freak about the house thanks to my mom beating me up for 18 years about keeping the house clean.  This is what I've always done.  I can't stand coming home to a messy house. 

 

So I bought a new Dyson, a Carpet scrubber, and a bunch of cleaning supplies and I just take care of the house cleaning schedule(bathroom twice a week, kitchen every night, sweet the floors every other night, dust once a week)  I went back to doing my own laundry because she lets hers and the kids pile up(she won't let me touch anyone else's clothes, had that fight already a few years ago) I got tired of running out of socks and underwear every week.

My wife is a wonderful woman.  Best mother the kids could have.  But a terrible house keeper.  Even when we had 1 kid, and she didn't work, it was the same.  And she usually gets mad at me for something(but I wouldn't be doing my job as a husband if I didn't push her buttons).  Wouldn't trade her for anything!

 

I've been through one divorce, don't want to do that again, didn't want to do that one, but there was no saving the mess we both turned that marriage into!


Edited by toomanytoys84, March 07, 2016 - 10:16 AM.

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