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Way OT - Cow stories for Dan'l and all the other cow chasers


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#31 oldedeeres OFFLINE  

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Posted September 18, 2015 - 09:02 AM

Those pyramid schemes make me angry when they involve animals. If you're dumb enough to invest in them you get hurt, in the pocket book. The unfortunate beast that is the current fad is the one that loses in the long run. I remember going to one of those "odd and unusual" sales at the stock exchange. The big money maker that year was hedge hogs. A fancy gal from Texas had about fourty of them in little cages and they were going for up to $1200.00 each for oddly coloured ones, spotted etc. She was a very pretty woman, knew how to play to the crowd using her accent to advantage. Some of the little prickle pigs were quite active and marched around on her hands, but at least five stayed rolled up tight and wouldn't move at all. She said they were "still asleep" after their long ride up here, kind of like hibernating you know. Upshot was they sold alright, but they certainly never woke up, and as soon as she was done in the ring that gal was gone! And the fancy coloured ones that brought the most money? Funny how dye will wear off after a while. There's one born every minute, as they say.
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#32 petrj6 ONLINE  

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Posted September 18, 2015 - 08:37 PM

   A few years back a good friend of mine lived in southern vt way up on the side of a mountain.  I used to go up there and help him maintain the road and other things around.  I had a tractor and was willing to help a friend, on the way up there was an "organic" farm.  basically a couple of wing nuts trying to farm without spending any money they raised chickens that were so skinny you felt bad for them and basically just made an ass out of farming.

   After two or three years I got to know them a little and they would ask me for help with some of there bigger projects, one day they asked me to help them with their new herd of black angus !! never had cattle before but they were going to give it a shot. they bought 13 head if I remember correctly, all about a year old and maybe 500 lbs each.  rite at that point where they are full of piss and vinegar.  so I go up there and have a look around and they have about two acres all fenced of with those fiberglass poles and an electric fence.  I see this and politely try to explain to them they need to beef that up.  they would not listen there were farms all around just like this, sure I say but they are all just temporary fields for milking cows and established herds that knew where home was.  Not for your new herd of young stock, well after two hours of back and forth the truck shows up.  driver gets out looks around and asks where do you want them ?  the couple respond rite here in our pasture.  driver looks at me and them and says you sure ? absolutely they respond.

   see where this is going yet ?  that driver backs around to the gate gets out and asks again, you sure?  I speak up and say no but the couple wont have anything to do with it.  open the door and let our new herd out !!  well those young stock get out of that trailer and start to tearing around that new field like it is their last day everyone is laughing and watching but me and the truck driver we are looking at each other and grinning like a couple of fools.  the cattle run around for ten min or so then decide they aren't happy in this field there is a much better meadow over there so they heads rite thru that fence on a dead run and never get seen again !!  the entire herd disappeared in the hills of southern vt.  not one of those cows were ever found !!

    You just cant fix stupid !!


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#33 OldBuzzard ONLINE  

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Posted September 19, 2015 - 07:43 PM

Many, many moons ago, there was a 'running joke' around the Mt. Carmel IN area.

 

Back in the 60's my step dad was still milking Holsteins and so was the neighbor to the East.

 

Now that neighbor was well known for his 'frugality', and his portion of the 'line fence' was always in pretty sad shape.

 

His 'frugality' also applied to his herd and he never kept a herd bull.

 

Every year with out fail, dad's bull, after 'taking care of business' with his ladies, and with the line fence easily negotiated, would end up over on the neighbor's side tending to those ladies as well.

 

Of course, dad knew that his bull was 'missing in action' as it's pretty obvious that he wasn't there when he brought the cows twice a day for milking.

 

Right on schedule, after he was gone for a few days, and the neighbor knew that all of his cows had been bred, dad would get a call.  "Dammit Morris, your bull is over in my pasture eating all my grass!". 

 

So, year after year, he got his cows bred for free and acted like it was in inconvenience :D :D :D


Edited by OldBuzzard, September 19, 2015 - 07:44 PM.

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#34 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted September 19, 2015 - 08:15 PM

Many, many moons ago, there was a 'running joke' around the Mt. Carmel IN area.

 

Back in the 60's my step dad was still milking Holsteins and so was the neighbor to the East.

 

Now that neighbor was well known for his 'frugality', and his portion of the 'line fence' was always in pretty sad shape.

 

His 'frugality' also applied to his herd and he never kept a herd bull.

 

Every year with out fail, dad's bull, after 'taking care of business' with his ladies, and with the line fence easily negotiated, would end up over on the neighbor's side tending to those ladies as well.

 

Of course, dad knew that his bull was 'missing in action' as it's pretty obvious that he wasn't there when he brought the cows twice a day for milking.

 

Right on schedule, after he was gone for a few days, and the neighbor knew that all of his cows had been bred, dad would get a call.  "Dammit Morris, your bull is over in my pasture eating all my grass!". 

 

So, year after year, he got his cows bred for free and acted like it was in inconvenience :D :D :D

 

I remember you telling me this story Dave.  He was a bit more than frugal!  :D



#35 MH81 OFFLINE  

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Posted September 19, 2015 - 08:35 PM

ST Vicwood MiMi and the Bagpipes.
It was my first year showing our Polled Herefords at the Great Stoneboro Fair near Mercer PA. I was 9 or 10, my prize Heifer was about 1 1/2.
It was sunny Monday (labor day to be exact), and perfect weather for the annual Cavalcade around the horse track. I think the track is a Half Mile... This will be important later.

Somehow, some brainiac decided to put the cattle about 2/3 of the way thru the parade. It just so happens the people immediately behind our Cattle Association were the Shriners. Another important tidbit.

Not sure if Shriner parade brigades were the same everywhere in the mid 80's, but the Kilts, regalia and the Bagpipes were commonplace at the bigger events. Unfortunately for me, MiMi hadn't been to any bigger events before.

We had gotten around the track partway before the crowd got populated enough to warrant all the pomp and circumstance. Just as we were all getting lined up and looking proper, the Shriners decided it was time to put their best foot forward as well.

I don't know how many of you have ever heard a bagpipe band winding up to play, but it's an interesting sound to say the least. Add to it the Doppler effect of being propelled away and it's positively surreal.

I say Doppler effect because the lead I was hanging onto had turned into a very fast moving rope that I didnt want to let go of. MiMi had heard her first bagpipe and wanted nothing to do with it.

My stride, normally in the two and a half foot range, was increasing exponentially. My purely scientific estimates put them at somewhere in the 8-10 foot range.

MiMi and I passed the horses, then the antique cars, the clown with the little dog... we really picked up speed as we went past the local politicians and the drill teams. It wasn't until we started closing in on the Dairy Pricess that we had enough distance between the bagpipes and MiMi's ears to allow me to quit High Stepping and get her head turned.

In short, it was the fastest parade I had ever been thru. I think we did about a ten second Quarter Mile and added to the excitement level for myself and all who MiMi and I passed.
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#36 CRFarnsworth OFFLINE  

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Posted September 20, 2015 - 01:05 PM

:D

ST Vicwood MiMi and the Bagpipes.

You know my EX-Mother-in -law was called MiMi, and she was from Pa., and she disliked bagpipes.
I wonder........Nah it just has to be coincidence!! :D Rick
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#37 toomanytoys84 OFFLINE  

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Posted September 20, 2015 - 01:38 PM

Great story there. Mimi and the bag pipes.

#38 LilysDad OFFLINE  

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Posted September 20, 2015 - 01:49 PM

Was this a previously published story Alan? You might have made good money as a kid.


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#39 HowardsMF155 OFFLINE  

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Posted September 20, 2015 - 02:38 PM

Lots of fun reading through these.  Thanks for sharing.



#40 KennyP ONLINE  

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Posted September 20, 2015 - 03:26 PM

Lots of fun reading through these.  Thanks for sharing.

I'll agree with that! We need a break from every day tractors and this makes great reading!



#41 camdigger OFFLINE  

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Posted September 22, 2015 - 01:19 PM

First year out of high school, Just after my 18th birthday, I worked on a farm that had a full scope beef operation, 135 cows, 50 - 2 year olds feeders. 125 yearlings, and 35 first calf heifers. The owner and his wife worked full time in Edmonton and commuted to the farm by Sylvan Lake 80 miles or so away on the weekends. They put up all the bedding straw and hay in small square bales stacked with an auto stacker. They fed 150 hay bales and usually bedded 30 straw bales a day. They also ground their own feed blends for the feeders and yearlings with a Gehl mixer mill with worn out hammers. I was alone 5 days a week and had every second weekend off. I did OK until calving season hit. Then time got tight, and I cut a few corners. As you might guess, that's when the real fun started.

At the beginning of the year, they were using a 3/4 ton 4 x 4 pickup to haul the feed. For the cows, the routine was to load, go through the gate out onto a hillside, put the pickup in 4wd low, and jump out, climb up on the load and spread the hay by cutting the strings and dumping the bales off the truck. When empty jump off the truck and run up and get in the cab and go back for more.... Not a big deal as the truck crawled along at just about a walking pace in 4 low....

The issue started when the cows discovered I'd been leaving the wire gate to the feed area open because this guy had a habit of making all wire gates fiddle string tight and a major PITA to open and close. Imagine some hungry cows running around a stack of hay in an open area with me in hot pursuit. Instead of going back into the pasture, the old gals would cut down between the stack and the fence and we'd go around again. I finally got smart and parked the truck across that opening while the old gals were behind the stack. Next round, I did get them back in where they belonged, but I was dragging pretty hard after chores that day.

Safety Nazis would have a stroke if they saw what we did to just "Get it done".... Wait till you hear how I did it after the truck broke down.....


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#42 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted September 22, 2015 - 01:30 PM

  Wait till you hear how I did it after the truck broke down.....

 

Anticipation! 


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#43 KennyP ONLINE  

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Posted September 22, 2015 - 04:25 PM

Anticipation! 

:watch_over_fence: :ditto:



#44 LilysDad OFFLINE  

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Posted September 22, 2015 - 05:28 PM

Why did you mention that the Gehl mill had "worn out hammers"? I'll be thinking about that while trying to sleep tonight.



#45 wvbuzzmaster OFFLINE  

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Posted September 22, 2015 - 05:33 PM

I'm still trying to figure out whether or not the cows were in the right fenced area or not most of the time. Have yet to think about how to break an unmanned truck... :poke:




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