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#1 LilysDad ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 04:40 PM

Sorry, I need to vent.
Last weekend my wife and. daughter had a big meltdown. Now I am waiting for a break in the weather, so we can go home.
To understand this you must know my wife had a hard youth and sees things a little differently. My daughter, she' a nut case. We went through this before about eight years ago and didn't have any contact for a long time.
I doubt we will ever make up. I feel like throwing up!
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#2 Cvans ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 04:45 PM

I'm so sorry to hear this. Certainly hope that you can work things out. 


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#3 KennyP ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 04:57 PM

Sorry to hear that! Not good having separated family.


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#4 case442 ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 05:05 PM

Sorry too hear of the situation hopefully all can be resolved. 


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#5 shorty ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 05:26 PM

Sorry to hear this LD. It is so tough when a family tie is split.


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#6 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 05:40 PM

I know how you feel Rich..  It's too bad your wife & her can't just agree to disagree and move on.  To totally blow up and hurt each other does nobody any good.  I went through the same thing with our 34 YO son last year and now he does as he wants as he isn't back living with us anymore.  You wanna make the rules and call the shots-  pay your own bills!   It was something I really couldn't let fly as his behavior was awful.  Forgiveness is a hard thing to do sometimes but your wife is PO'ed about something I'll wager she has a good reason to be..  Kids have to learn the hard way sometimes..  Walk away and take your time driving on these crappy roads we have now!  


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#7 glgrumpy OFFLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 05:41 PM

I've never understood how family's can hold items against each other so long or hard. I've always been the type that thinks both should sit-down with NO loud or physical action started and think out what the problems are and if not actuallly fix those, then at least figure ways to accept the others ways and be OK with it. Hmmm! Sounding like a politician here.  Both parties should state what they think would be best for them to handle and give a little to make it so.

 

P.S.  You have to move out to motel or such?  If not, that is first part of the healing, still being able to be there.


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#8 MH81 ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 05:47 PM

We have a segmented family too. One branch has fallen off and we lost several years of being a family.
Their Granddaughter is sick and will be so for the rest of her life
They recently lost their son to cancer
We all could've gotten together and help care for & support or at least prayed and called to commiserate.
I think they feel they have to lie in the bed they made, but they don't. We are still here, waiting for them to call if they need us or want to rejoin the family.

Rich, I feel for you... It sucks.
If it wont strain your home life, Do what you would always do. Send Birthday cards, call once in a while, let her know that you still love her. Just be firm in the fact you dont want in the middle.
Maybe that will shorten the bridge.
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#9 petrj6 ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 06:01 PM

I think we all have had family troubles, I myself haven't spoken to my brother in 8 years and have no intentions of ever doing so again.  hope it works out well for you but remember you have to live with the wife full time :D.


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#10 DennyIN OFFLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 06:28 PM

I have two cousins that walked away from family years ago. One was arrogant, fathered children he didn't support, and they now have nothing to do with him. The other walked away over 40 years ago, don't know if he knows both of his parents are now gone and his handicapped brother lives in a home. I don't even know if he is even alive. It sure makes it hard on the family. Love is tough sometimes. I pray your fences get mended before it is too late. 

 

 

 

Romans 12: 17, 18, 21


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#11 boyscout862 ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 06:30 PM

I think we all have had family troubles, I myself haven't spoken to my brother in 8 years and have no intentions of ever doing so again.  hope it works out well for you but remember you have to live with the wife full time :D.

I have two that I haven't talked to in years. I have no intention of ever talking to them again now that mom died. They tried to cheat me on an inheritence and I wouldn't let them. To the rest of the family this was terrible, I was supposed to trust them that they would pay me the $20,000 later. Having known them for 50 years, I knew they wouldn't.  It is no loss to cut your ties to bad family. My inlaws were terrible and they are still costing me money 6 years after the last one died.

 

There was a prayer that went something about: Grant me the courage to change what I can, the serenity to accept what I can't change, and the wisdom to know the difference. Good Luck, Rick


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#12 toomanytoys84 OFFLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 06:48 PM

Me and my mom had many fights and differences when I was 16 to 20. It was her behavior not mine. She is bipolar and stopped taking her meds and she just up and left. We didn't talk for 4 years.

Fast forward to when I was 20 my grandmother told me talk to your mom and help her. Because one day she will be gone and you will be the ones with regrets and guilt. I thought on it awhile and called my mom. We worked it out she was ready to get help again. Her and my dad never divorced they got back together and now 11 years later we have a good relationship and are really close.

Saying all that it is possible to mend family relationships but it takes swallowing your pride and talking like civilized people.

I hope the best for you and your family.
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#13 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 07:06 PM

 

There was a prayer that went something about: Grant me the courage to change what I can, the serenity to accept what I can't change, and the wisdom to know the difference. Good Luck, Rick

The Serenity Prayer..

 

Lord,

 

Grant me the Serenity to accept things I cannot change.

 

The Courage to change the things I can..

 

And the Wisdom to know the difference..  

 

I've prayed that prayer many times in recent years..  


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#14 David Brown OFFLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 07:06 PM

If it wont strain your home life, Do what you would always do. Send Birthday cards, call once in a while, let her know that you still love her. Just be firm in the fact you dont want in the middle.
Maybe that will shorten the bridge.

Man, that's tough.  We sure appreciate you sharing this with us.  That itself can't be easy.  Thanks for giving us the chance to rally around you in support.  I can't begin to imagine losing contact with either one of my girls.  That can't be easy.  I have to agree with Allen.  Definitely take the high road here.  Someday she may realize that you really do love her unconditionally and that you never, ever gave up on her.  I just feel that is extremely important to a child whatever the age.  May God work in this situation to bring eventual healing.


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#15 superaben OFFLINE  

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Posted February 16, 2015 - 08:27 PM

Really sorry to hear all this, Rich.  I can't imagine the feeling.  I'll be praying for you.

 

Ben W.


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