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Official Joke Thread


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#1726 Auburn David OFFLINE  

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Posted March 11, 2016 - 10:54 PM

Check this OUT!

Nice boat...and girls...and van...



#1727 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted March 12, 2016 - 05:03 AM

12794501_595863730560932_5208256001925164616_n.jpg


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#1728 MH81 ONLINE  

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Posted March 12, 2016 - 07:51 AM

https://www.facebook...25432091098814/


No go.
If it's a video, maybe search for it on YouTube?

#1729 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted March 13, 2016 - 06:09 PM

https://www.facebook...10304582335689/



#1730 LilysDad ONLINE  

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Posted March 13, 2016 - 08:12 PM

Prison vs Work

 

IN PRISON..........you spend the majority of your time in a 10’x10’ cell.
AT WORK............you spend the majority of your time in an 8’x8’ cubicle.
IN PRISON.........you get three meals a day.
AT WORK...........you get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.
IN PRISON..........you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK............you get more work for good behavior.
IN PRISON..........the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK............you're often required to carry a security card and open all the doors yourself.
IN PRISON..........you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK...........you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
IN PRISON.........you get your own toilet.
AT WORK..........you share the toilet with some people who pee on the seat.
IN PRISON..........they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK............you're not supposed to even speak to your family.
IN PRISON.........all expenses are paid by the taxpayers.
AT WORK............you pay all your expenses to get to work, and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.
IN PRISON..........you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK ...........you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.
IN PRISON .you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK...........they're called managers.


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#1731 oldedeeres ONLINE  

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Posted March 14, 2016 - 12:28 AM

Sorry guys, I guess I didn't transfer this properly. Will try again later.

Edited by oldedeeres, March 14, 2016 - 08:02 PM.

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#1732 KennyP ONLINE  

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Posted March 14, 2016 - 04:47 AM

Link is messed up!



#1733 pick-to-stone OFFLINE  

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Posted March 14, 2016 - 12:52 PM

Prison vs Work
 
IN PRISON..........you spend the majority of your time in a 10’x10’ cell.
AT WORK............you spend the majority of your time in an 8’x8’ cubicle.
IN PRISON.........you get three meals a day.
AT WORK...........you get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.
IN PRISON..........you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK............you get more work for good behavior.
IN PRISON..........the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK............you're often required to carry a security card and open all the doors yourself.
IN PRISON..........you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK...........you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
IN PRISON.........you get your own toilet.
AT WORK..........you share the toilet with some people who pee on the seat.
IN PRISON..........they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK............you're not supposed to even speak to your family.
IN PRISON.........all expenses are paid by the taxpayers.
AT WORK............you pay all your expenses to get to work, and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.
IN PRISON..........you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK ...........you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.
IN PRISON .you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK...........they're called managers.


I chose prison
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#1734 oldedeeres ONLINE  

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Posted March 14, 2016 - 09:03 PM

untitled.jpg


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#1735 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted March 14, 2016 - 09:07 PM

Looks like Gerald!


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#1736 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted March 15, 2016 - 09:13 AM

12799225_1123918470993990_3450838187331316630_n.jpg

 

12809567_1044142775671599_2682080982623533450_n.jpg


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#1737 tater195 OFFLINE  

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    I dont deny your history..... dont deny mine

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Posted March 15, 2016 - 12:03 PM

My son was working in the shop last night, overhead doors open and music blaring, when a skunk came in. the dogs tried to chase it out and one got sprayed. My son finished what he was doing and closed up the shop. About an hour later her told me what had happened and the last time he saw the skunk it was still in the shop. I went out to check and heard it scratching on the door to get out. I opened the side door and turned on the light. The dogs rushed in and got sprayed. I opened the overhead door to let it out and I lost site of it. After I closed the shop back up, I found it over by the house. The dogs started barking and the damn skunk charged at the dogs from 30 yards away. I grabbed the pellet rifle from the shop and tried to get a shot off, but you can imagine trying to find a skunk in the dark through the sight while it is chasing the dogs. I finally got a good position with the light behind it and not moving with a straight on shot. It didnt seem to phase it much at first, so I went back in the shop for more pellets. When I came back, it was laying on its side, so I popped 2 more in the vitals to make sure.

We have seen several critters with dumb rabies or distemper that act drunk and you can walk right up to them. This is the first time I have actually seen one with aggressive rabies that chases dogs. These are farm dogs and I normally dont haul them to town for shots, but this may have changed my thinking on that.


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#1738 LilysDad ONLINE  

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Posted March 15, 2016 - 12:12 PM

Did you make your son sleep outside with the dogs? (phew!)


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#1739 oldedeeres ONLINE  

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Posted March 15, 2016 - 02:11 PM

Confucus say: "Wise man does not keep sledge hammer in same room with slow computer"
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#1740 Marty'70 ONLINE  

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Posted March 15, 2016 - 06:36 PM

Oh yeah!!3505850075ddf35b63b43813744d2c3c.jpg
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