Jump to content

Nominations for Tractor of the Month
Garden Tractors and Parts on eBay



Photo
- - - - -

Why Does Life Throw So Much At You


  • Please log in to reply
78 replies to this topic

#16 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

WNYTractorTinkerer

    Tinker Master

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Member No: 10789
  • 8,317 Thanks
  • 4,664 posts
  • Location: Avon, NY

Posted January 03, 2014 - 02:42 AM

Sounds like you have something larger on your plate but as said you can't discuss it..  Why the hell else would you even sweat this?  All I can offer is that you need to weigh the pros and cons and make your decision based on your situation..  Once you do you will need to put your full effort into it.  

 

Good Luck! :driving_big_tractor:


  • hamman, boyscout862 and oldedeeres have said thanks

#17 David Brown OFFLINE  

David Brown

    I said I work on them. I never said I fix them!

  • Senior Member
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 8570
  • 4,219 Thanks
  • 2,316 posts

Posted January 03, 2014 - 05:50 AM

It's always hard to uproot the family and move, but you have to look at this.  You have the opportunity to do what so many people wish they could, advance without a degree.  That just doesn't happen.  You've recieved some excellent advice here and I can only reiterate it at this point.  I like the idea of renting your existing house out.  Causes you to live rent or mortgage free at the next place.  You don't have to move two hours away, maybe an hour away?  Closer to family, not horrible to work.  I too believe that God works in wonderful and mysterious ways and for this to just pop up out of the blue like it did could mean that this is the path that you are to take.  Just think of how good it would look on a resume.  I assume you know what this job is all about and that there would be no surprises?  You are obviously good at what you do, the guy thinks enough of you to offer you the position, the family is behind you, you said yourself that it may help the present prayer request situation, it's not THAT far away that you couldn't see family often and it's a big bump in pay which gives your kids a full time mom.  In the words of Charlie Sheen...  WINNING.

 

My present job was a choice that I had to make.  I work for what was a very small company that was purchased and moved from California to Alabama.  The building looked like a building that was bombed in WW2, they couldn't find a decent work force, it was difficult to get into the markets that they wanted to get into, etc.  I had a good job as a supervisor of a drafting department for a growing company and I got a call from my present boss that he wanted me to come and work for him at this little company in Alabama.  I would go back to being a detailer again.  Now my situation was a no brainer of sorts because I got to work from home.  I still had the uncertainty of leaving a well established and very busy company for this little "experiment".  You may not think it was much of a choice compared to what you are faced with but, believe me, it was.  Well I took the offer and now, almost 9 years later, the company is growing like mad and we;ve become a major player in the field that we were trying to break into.  I'm making way more as a detailer than I ever did as a supervisor, and on and on.  My enticement was working from home.  Yours is the position and what you are able to do once you have it.  Every time you change jobs, it's a gamble, a chance you take.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Sometimes these opportunites are stepping stones to the next one.  I could write all day about my own personal situations through out my career, every job offer, every job I took or didn't take.  Let's just say, it's a faith walk.  Have faith, believe in your own abilities and face this head on.  You were offered this position for a reason.  Maybe its time to find out what that reason is?


  • hamman, boyscout862 and oldedeeres have said thanks

#18 Guest_Fluid_*

Guest_Fluid_*
  • Guests
  • Member No: 0
  • 0 Thanks

Posted January 03, 2014 - 06:05 AM

I kind of need to type. You guys listen great. I don't mean to make this a forum for advice but I think you guys understand. I need to type something or talk to someone but everyone is asleep and i dont have many close friends. Anything I say here is not to brag or anything. If you know me that is not my style. I am a country boy and play with old garden tractors.

I had made a post about my job a little while ago. It's been going great. Week at home(working at my normal mine) and a week at the mine in WV. Been going well. Wife has adjusted(and went to part time) and I have to a degree. Living out of motels gets old and lonely.

I am home this week going back Monday to spend my week out of town. My boss got out of a meeting at the main office at 10pm and called me and said he had been promoted to maintenance director at a corporate level and I am being promoted to his assistant if I want it. Of course I want it. I'd be higher than all my bosses that I have HATED forever. And my goal has always been to be corporate and a B function manager.

Here is the kicker. I have to relocate down there permanently. Incentives to this? They are numerous and include money beyond my wildest dreams. More than I ever thought I a boy who barely graduated high school and failed out of college could ever obtain. Relocation money including a 20% down payment on a house of my choice and several other very attractive offers.

It's 2 hours away from home. Home from the town I grew up in. From a house that I love. From my parents. My wife's family and every thing I know and love.

My wife woke up when the phone ran (she is used to my phone ringing and didn't think much of it) I told her the news and the words out of her mouth were when do we leave? She wants to go(and this would enable her to be a full time stay at home mom) Especially with the developments that I can't mention(my prayer request). Being away from here would be a great improvement for my step daughter. And my wife isn't all that close with her family.

I am at a complete loss. Money isn't everything as i well know. And money isn't an issue now. We are comfortable and basically live a pretty worry free life when it comes to money. I love my parents. I love this little crap hole town and i want my kids to know all their grandparents.

Argh. Too much on my mind now. I'll never sleep tonight.

If I did take this would it be strange to not sell my current home? I love this house and want to come back here when this is done. May be 20 or 25 years but yeah

Please don't take this the wrong way, but If your looking for sympathy look it up in the Webster Dictionary.  You are looking at a future that alot of people don't have a chance of ever obtaining. There are people that are homeless that would kill for your future. I think you will do the right thing for you and your family whatever choice you make. Put your mind at ease. Good Luck






  


  • hamman, oldedeeres and JoeMopar have said thanks

#19 Gtractor OFFLINE  

Gtractor

    The Tractor Hoarder

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 782
  • 6,625 Thanks
  • 3,917 posts
  • Location: Chillicothe, MO

Posted January 03, 2014 - 06:10 AM

Opportunity is knocking - open the door and enjoy the ride. 

Your wife wants to go - thats half the [usual] battle right there

My brother moved 2 hours away back in 1999.  I still see him all the time. We get together any weekend we want. 

 

Congratulations!!


  • hamman, twostep, WNYTractorTinkerer and 1 other said thanks

#20 IamSherwood ONLINE  

IamSherwood

    Elf guardian

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 2066
  • 8,379 Thanks
  • 7,696 posts
  • Location: Northern Ontario

Posted January 03, 2014 - 07:27 AM

I hope you eventually got to sleep.

Most everything has been said in detail already.

Pretty straight forward, I think. Wife wants it, good for step daughter, good money, not too far away.

Keep the house, and find a good renter. Find a place to live, where you'd commute 1/2 hour.

All the best. :thumbs:


  • hamman and oldedeeres have said thanks

#21 Bmerf OFFLINE  

Bmerf

    Patina Farmer / Rust Collector

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 9846
  • 1,708 Thanks
  • 1,445 posts
  • Location: benton harbor, mi

Posted January 03, 2014 - 08:41 AM

I hope you eventually got to sleep.

Most everything has been said in detail already.

Pretty straight forward, I think. Wife wants it, good for step daughter, good money, not too far away.

Keep the house, and find a good renter. Find a place to live, where you'd commute 1/2 hour.

All the best. :thumbs:

:ditto: 2 hours from grandparents or missing half of the kids life being gone a week at a time? No brainer take the job. Life is forever changing, We get scared when faced with something new, especially when it is something we have always dreamed of and worked so hard to get. We constantly ask ourselves if we are worthy for we don't want to disappoint. Someone thinks your are worthy or the offer never would have been made.

I lost my job of twenty years and had to ask myself what do I do now? Well of course the answer was 'the same as you've always done': work hard and the opportunities will present themselves. Now, 3 1/2 years into the new career, can't see myself ever going back. Love my new position in life.


  • JoeMopar said thank you

#22 HDWildBill OFFLINE  

HDWildBill

    Freedom is not Free. Thank those in uniform for your freedom.

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 6354
  • 8,710 Thanks
  • 8,563 posts
  • Location: Ga

Posted January 03, 2014 - 08:54 AM

  First off congrats on your new job. 

 

A lot of good advice.  As you can see I live in GA, my daughter lives in VA which is a lot further then 2 hrs.  When her son was born she made a decision that he was going to know his grandfather and have a relationship with him.  She has made every effort to make that happen.  Either they come down or we go up every 6 months or so.  We talk on the phone and video conference and of course email and snail mail.  If you truly want your kids to know your family then you  & your wife can make it happen.  All it takes is a little determination. Good luck in your new job.


  • boyscout862 said thank you

#23 boyscout862 ONLINE  

boyscout862
  • Senior Member
  • Member No: 8923
  • 9,803 Thanks
  • 7,543 posts
  • Location: N.E. Connecticut

Posted January 03, 2014 - 09:06 AM

All life changes have pros and cons. Take the opportunity if you trust your boss. Otherwise it will probably be an insult to him. He has most likely stuck his neck out to promote you. If you take the job, after you are settled in look at getting a degree. Many state universities offer legitimate degrees on line. Many of the on line schools do not award properly accredited degrees so go with one of the state schools. I hope it all goes well for you. Good Luck, Rick



#24 olcowhand ONLINE  

olcowhand

    Red Tractor Nut & Diesel Addict

  • Staff Admin
  • Staff
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Sponsor
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 20
  • 35,650 Thanks
  • 29,840 posts
  • Location: South Central Kentucky

Posted January 03, 2014 - 09:14 AM

I say take it, and take it NOW!  The kid's having a full time Mom is enough for me.  Then the fact you will see those kids every day....priceless!  You will end up with a happier family, and a much more stable one at that.  Not saying you all aren't stable now, but having both parents there every day is just something you can't beat, regardless of where you live.  2 hours is no big deal to go see Grandparents.   The week you spend away from your family is how many hours?  Keep the present home if you want/can, but please don't miss the opportunity to be a family you've not been able to be due to so much time apart.  


  • KennyP said thank you

#25 Canawler ONLINE  

Canawler

    Member

  • Senior Member
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 1273
  • 1,893 Thanks
  • 1,750 posts
  • Location: York, PA

Posted January 03, 2014 - 09:54 AM

.... I told her the news and the words out of her mouth were when do we leave? She wants to go

 

I missed this in the first read through.

 

 

 

....Like you think you have a choice in this......                    :smilewink:


  • boyscout862 and Team_Green have said thanks

#26 olcowhand OFFLINE  

olcowhand

    Red Tractor Nut & Diesel Addict

  • Staff Admin
  • Staff
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Sponsor
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 20
  • 35,650 Thanks
  • 29,840 posts
  • Location: South Central Kentucky

Posted January 03, 2014 - 09:59 AM

Posted Today, 09:54 AM

toomanytoys84, on 02 Jan 2014 - 10:29 PM, said:snapback.png

.... I told her the news and the words out of her mouth were when do we leave? She wants to go

 

I missed this in the first read through.

 

 

 

....Like you think you have a choice in this......                    :smilewink:

 

Yes, it's obvious the wife is needing a change, the kids need both their parents every day...... if you really want to do the right thing, then take that new position.  This chance will likely NEVER EVER come again.  The wife might never forgive you man.  Besides, if you ALL agree it isn't what you all wanted, you'd still have your old home to return to.



#27 DougT ONLINE  

DougT

    Dog Approved

  • Super Moderator
  • Staff
  • -GTt Supporter-
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 584
  • 5,731 Thanks
  • 4,287 posts
  • Location: north central Ohio

Posted January 03, 2014 - 10:43 AM

I know people that commute 1 1/2-2 hrs each way to work everyday and have done it for years. Everyone here seems to agree that seat time is a good thing. Gopher it!!!!



#28 JD DANNELS ONLINE  

JD DANNELS

    Tractorholic

  • Senior Member
  • Member No: 2011
  • 3,786 Thanks
  • 3,907 posts
  • Location: Newton.Ia

Posted January 03, 2014 - 11:45 AM

Congratulations! These opportunities don't come everyday and as you said you worked hard to get it.

If you don't commute 2 hrs can seem like a lot . But having commuted 45 minute + morning and night  for 28 yrs It's not that bad. The funny thing about it is there are people I work with every day that spend 30 minutes on the road and never get out of the city.

I would have commuted 2 hrs each way every day if it had meant my wife could be home with the kids when they were small.

Never got the option and have regretted it. Good luck with your choice!!


Edited by JD DANNELS, January 03, 2014 - 11:46 AM.


#29 JD DANNELS OFFLINE  

JD DANNELS

    Tractorholic

  • Senior Member
  • Member No: 2011
  • 3,786 Thanks
  • 3,907 posts
  • Location: Newton.Ia

Posted January 03, 2014 - 01:00 PM

I might add that my Neighbor was faced with a simular Decision a couple years ago. He lived near Rochester Mn, probably 3 + hrs away.

He took the Job of Fire Chief in Newton and moved down here. Real close to his family and friends he is in Minnesota  about every other weekend. If he is not there his or her parents are down here.



#30 AverageJoe OFFLINE  

AverageJoe

    Member

  • Senior Member
  • Contributor
  • Member No: 365
  • 104 Thanks
  • 142 posts
  • Location: Virginia

Posted January 03, 2014 - 01:18 PM

I kind of need to type. You guys listen great. I don't mean to make this a forum for advice but I think you guys understand. I need to type something or talk to someone but everyone is asleep and i dont have many close friends. Anything I say here is not to brag or anything. If you know me that is not my style. I am a country boy and play with old garden tractors.

I had made a post about my job a little while ago. It's been going great. Week at home(working at my normal mine) and a week at the mine in WV. Been going well. Wife has adjusted(and went to part time) and I have to a degree. Living out of motels gets old and lonely.

I am home this week going back Monday to spend my week out of town. My boss got out of a meeting at the main office at 10pm and called me and said he had been promoted to maintenance director at a corporate level and I am being promoted to his assistant if I want it. Of course I want it. I'd be higher than all my bosses that I have HATED forever. And my goal has always been to be corporate and a B function manager.

Here is the kicker. I have to relocate down there permanently. Incentives to this? They are numerous and include money beyond my wildest dreams. More than I ever thought I a boy who barely graduated high school and failed out of college could ever obtain. Relocation money including a 20% down payment on a house of my choice and several other very attractive offers.

It's 2 hours away from home. Home from the town I grew up in. From a house that I love. From my parents. My wife's family and every thing I know and love.

My wife woke up when the phone ran (she is used to my phone ringing and didn't think much of it) I told her the news and the words out of her mouth were when do we leave? She wants to go(and this would enable her to be a full time stay at home mom) Especially with the developments that I can't mention(my prayer request). Being away from here would be a great improvement for my step daughter. And my wife isn't all that close with her family.

I am at a complete loss. Money isn't everything as i well know. And money isn't an issue now. We are comfortable and basically live a pretty worry free life when it comes to money. I love my parents. I love this little crap hole town and i want my kids to know all their grandparents.

Argh. Too much on my mind now. I'll never sleep tonight.

If I did take this would it be strange to not sell my current home? I love this house and want to come back here when this is done. May be 20 or 25 years but yeah

 

Wow.  A promotion to a career, versus a job.

Only two hours from "home"?  My daily commute is nearly 4 hours.

And your wife is good-to-go?

A very generous relocation package?

 

Kind of a no-brainer.


Edited by AverageJoe, January 03, 2014 - 01:18 PM.

  • twostep and Team_Green have said thanks




Top