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Olcowhands Daddy Surgery Has Begun.


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#421 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 01, 2014 - 09:58 PM

Wow. Have you tried to sit her down and have a talk? Or is that out of the question.

 

Not yet, but it's gonna have to happen, but not just me, every one of my siblings need to be there.  Right now I'm just taking a breather while I can.


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#422 SupplySergeant ONLINE  

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Posted January 02, 2014 - 09:03 AM

Good luck Daniel! I'm dealing with my MIL showing signs of dementia and my FIL being stubborn about his health issues, so I feel some of your pain. Hope you can get the siblings behind you, it can be a huge help.

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#423 David Brown OFFLINE  

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Posted January 02, 2014 - 09:19 AM

Wow, I could have swore I replied to this a while ago but I guess not.  Daniel, I feel for you.  Glad dad is doing better but I am saddened to see what you have to go through.  Family situation are never fun.  My dad is 89 and still lives on his own in his house which is good.  I am the closest sibling so I take care of snow removal and such things.  Pretty much whatever he needs.  My siblings are all in the general area but none live nearly as close as I do.  They are good about helping as they can which is great.  Everybody likes my dad so he's never short of good help.  It breaks my heart to see situations such as what you are faced with.  It's times like this where everyone needs to sit down and agree that the care of your dad is the number one priority for everyone.  Once that is agreed upon, it becomes much easier.  I know, easier said than done.


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#424 toomanytoys84 ONLINE  

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Posted January 02, 2014 - 03:22 PM

Same thing happened when my grandfather was sick with my grandmother.

 

My mom, aunt, and myself had to sit down and talk to her.  Turns out she was scared mainly.  Scared because he wasn't himself, scared because he was sick(he had always been so healthy and strong.  He was the pillar of the family) and mainly she wanted to ignore he was sick and nag and complain. 


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#425 trowel OFFLINE  

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Posted January 02, 2014 - 03:44 PM

Having the ''talk'' is one of the hardest things to do, afterwords it is the aftermath that really defines everyone.

Slow and steady, think everything though. Hoping for the best for you.


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#426 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 06, 2014 - 09:47 PM

Dad is doing fairly well, but his strength is still limited.  He says they told him he may come home tomorrow, but that can't be the case.  I don't know where he's coming up with this, but I hope it's not totally imaginary or things aren't good.  Maybe he's taking bits of what is said & puts it together how he'd like it to be.  I spoke to his nurse & she has no idea where he got that in his head.  Otherwise he speaks like he's fine.   Everything else he says seems spot-on.  Not gotten to see him in a few days, being so busy with the farm & dealing with getting through this flu I have.  Hope to go see him tomorrow.


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#427 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 07, 2014 - 05:35 PM

Dad still had it in his head he was going home today.  He had all his stuff packed in his suitcase even.  Hated to have to tell him, but he's not released, and won't be for a while yet.  He's planning his weekend getaway for going out to eat, but I have no idea if I'll be able to take him & Mom, and not sure if anyone else will step up.  Walls are closing on me again.  I'll get him out to eat somehow.


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#428 KennyP OFFLINE  

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Posted January 07, 2014 - 06:08 PM

Like I posted in the farm thread, adding family issues into the farm can be very exasperating.


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#429 HDWildBill OFFLINE  

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Posted January 07, 2014 - 06:40 PM

The wife has a friend who is 92, still lives on her own but she has moments like that, where she will get an idea or hear something partially and run with it and you can not get her to understand no that is not the way it is.  This may be another issue that you may have to deal with.  Like Kenny said you add family to an already frustrating schedule and you have a brand new game.


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#430 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 09, 2014 - 12:11 PM

My sister from Louisville is coming down to take Dad out to lunch at his favorite Chinese place Saturday.  Looks like one of my brothers is going also, as well as another of my sisters if she isn't sick from chemo.  I may go depending on how tired I am.  I'll likely go visit Dad late this afternoon after I finish feeding.


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#431 toomanytoys84 ONLINE  

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Posted January 09, 2014 - 04:14 PM

Has your cold settled down?  I am getting it in my chest bad!  The below zero weather seems to of made it worse.  Hacking up all kinds of nasty stuff.

 

Your Dad probably wants to go home so bad that he convinced himself that he was going home.  Sometimes we all like to hear what we want to hear and roll with it.  Even if we know its not true.


Edited by toomanytoys84, January 09, 2014 - 04:15 PM.

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#432 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 09, 2014 - 07:26 PM

Just got back from visiting Dad. He seems to be in decent spirits, but a bit bored as can be expected.  He realizes he will likely never return to the strength he had before the operation, but still wants to try to get there.  His supper came while we were there, vegetable soup, grilled cheese sandwich, cookie, and 12oz tea.  He ate it down in a heartbeat!  He is eating great, so that will help him regain his strength.  Last time he weighed, he had GAINED a pound.  He said he was told he might go home this coming Tuesday, but I've heard nothing from staff about that yet.  I'll call the social services lady tomorrow to find out if there is that possibility.

 

TMT84....yes, the flu is losing it's grip on me.  Just a bit on the tired side, and chest congestion left, along with poor hearing in my left ear from the ear infection.  


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#433 Texas Deere and Horse OFFLINE  

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Posted January 09, 2014 - 08:44 PM

Glad to hear a good report about Dad, let him know We're still PRAYING for him and Your whole family..


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#434 olcowhand OFFLINE  

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Posted January 10, 2014 - 12:41 PM

Dad just called from his cell phone.  My brother took Mom & Dad out to dinner today.  He called from the car while Mom was in the grocery store.  Marty is bringing Dad home for a few hours getaway time.  Dad seemed glad to be out & about, but he said he's already tuckering out.  He knows it's normal though, so he said he'll just keep working at it.  :thumbs:


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#435 Cvans ONLINE  

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Posted January 10, 2014 - 12:55 PM

 

 

He knows it's normal though, so he said he'll just keep working at it.

 

Sounds like you Dad still has the right frame of mind. That sure makes things easier for everyone.  :D


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