As Fathers, we have numerous responsibilities to fill. Some are hard to fill, others seem to be easy as they just come to us naturally. There are no perfect Fathers in this world, but we can all try and strive to do our best, and be all that we can be.
We need to be the protector of the family, and keep our family and household from harm and danger. We want our children to feel like they can hide behind us whenever they are scared. We want them to know that Daddy's are a security blanket whenever they need comfort and assurance. We aren't afraid to hold them and tell them that everything will be alright.
We need to be the supporter, and provider. We aren't afraid to get dirty and work long hours, just so our children can have the best. Our main focus is not providing for our own best interest, but to strive and put our children's needs and wants first. We have a responsibility to encourage our children, and to boost their spirits whenever they have doubt. We need to show them that we are proud of them even if they fail.
We need to be a councilor and be willing to listen to their problems, hurts, and needs. We are the crutch that the are looking for, and we need to be strong and supporting, even though sometimes we don't always agree with their decisions or ideas. Sometimes we can have a solution, sometimes we can't. Just having the willingness to listen will go a long way. We must not be to quick to give advice, or to find a solution, but instead, give them the space required to let them figure it out on their own.
We need to be the teacher and the principal. We can show them all we know about life, and express to them what all we have been through in our lives even though they won't always understand the answers. We need to teach them right from wrong, and explain the consequences if they pick the wrong decision. We need to discipline at times, and even though it hurts us more than it hurts them, we must follow through and know that it's for their own good, and hope that they understand why.
As a Father, we must always show them that they are Loved. There must always be time for hugs and kisses, and there must always be time set aside for sharing. We as Fathers can easily get wrapped up with miscellaneous projects, and there are times when hugs and kisses just don't seem convenient, but we must make the time, as all it takes is for one time for us to say, "not right now", and we could open the door for resentment, which causes additional hurt. There are never enough "I Love You's". My oldest son just turned thirteen, and is at the stage of knowing it all, and thinks he's a grown man. However, each night before bed, he looks forward to me kissing him on his forehead and telling him I Love You, just before he goes to sleep. If there is a time that I may have forgotten, or I'm not home when he goes to bed, he is sure to remind me of it the next morning. Believe me, it's a Great feeling, and a sense of satisfaction to know that, even though he thinks he can make his own decisions, you are still missed, needed and loved.
I can't speak for all Fathers on this subject, but for me, I choose to take on a responsibility to show my children the love and commitment of our Heavenly Father. I try to show them his love for us, through my actions, prayer, and through my love for them. Christ gave his all for us, and I'm willing to give my all for them. Every night we sit down as a family for dinner, and we pray over the meal, and any needs that may need lifted up, and then we all say together, Amen. As we enjoy our meal together, Kathy and I listen to each one of our three kids, tell us about their day, sometimes are exciting, some not so much. But I try and give each of them my undivided attention, and try and show each of them that I'm interested in what they have to say. When they are excited, I get excited, when they hurt, I give them comfort, and when they are confused, I try and give guidance, or try to find a solution.
And lastly, we need to be a companion. I think it's safe to say that we as Fathers, want to be close to our kids, and want our kids to think of us, not only as Dad, but also as "Best Friends". They should be able to confide all of their secrets, wants, needs, and concerns to us, and know that what they tell us will safe and or fulfilled. I don't think any of us want our kids confiding in others, and taking a chance that they will be lead astray. We also need to be a good example, not just as a Dad, but also as a Loving Husband. Our kids watch us constantly, and they study our every moves. If we are a good Husband to our Wives, and show respect to our Wives, then we will earn respect and Love from our children.
I didn't mean to hi-jack the thread here, but more to challenge other Fathers out there to be the Best they can be. My Father and I weren't exactly close when I was young, nor even after I started my own family. I had to learn these things on my own, and after I became a Father, I decided that I want to give all of the Love and time I can for my kids. Work was the most important thing in my Dad's life when I was growing up, and he just never had the time to spend with me when I needed him the most. So I'm committed to giving every minute I can to my kids, and spend as long as it takes with them, to show them that I'm there for them no matter what. I'm not the perfect Dad in the world by any means, but I strive to be the best Father I can be to my Children, and can only hope that my example toward them will make them want to be as good as they can be when they become Fathers someday.
Edited by johndeereelfman, June 16, 2013 - 11:31 AM.