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The Adventures Of My New Hat


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#796 UncleWillie ONLINE  

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Posted May 14, 2013 - 11:51 PM

The eagle has landed. It is now midnight and I have been up since before the sin was this morning. I will give a more detailed report tomorrow when I wake up - hopefully right before time to go back to bed.

#797 drbish ONLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 02:35 AM

Glad you had a safe trip.



#798 UncleWillie ONLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 11:59 AM

Truck lag is bad stuff...


Yesterday at the crack of early Tennessee Ernie Ford started singine 16 Tons on my alarm clock so I grabbed my shovel and walked to the lin..coffee pot.


I had to sit for one cup because I couldn't figure out which way was up. Once that was decided I slapped my hat on my head and went out the door.

First the Buick Lesbre I got for scrap had to come apart. Took about an hour and a half to do that. Then we loaded up the VanGuard that was going to SearsYellow, all the catalytic converters, and radiators on the trailer with LittleDeeres 400.

Steph went back in to finish the last of the packing while I hopped in the BlueOx and headed to the scrap yard.

Got unloaded and got my cash then headed to Southern States to get chicken feed.

Next stop was the pharmacy where I was told the prescription we requested to be refilled was never returned by the doctors office. So I called Steph and told her to call the doc and get them to fax it.

Got home and dropped the trailer and Steph grabbed a tow chain. OldSmokey and the little 4wd S10 had to be moved so I could mow the front yard. After she got the Hemorrhoids bumper caught in the Warbeasts trailer hitch the front never got mowed.

With the truck moved I hopped on the Homorrhoid and looked at the fuel tank. It was empty. So I grabbed a gas can and saddled Christine up and rode to the gas station.

Back at the house I had the front yard and the neighbors ditch mowed in about an hour. Too much stuff to mow around – makes me dizzy.

Once that was done I went next door to tell the neighbor we would be gone and to shoot anyone they saw there.

In the house I took a much needed shower, grabbed a few things that Steph didn’t think to pack and we loaded up, hooked up to the little trailer with the 400 on it and left.

Back to the pharmacy. They were just finishing up the order when we got there. Then we shot across town and down a back road to get a splash of gas to get us to SC to get cheap gas. OF course we got behind a line of cars that was held up by one person going 10 – 30 in a 55 zone.

Got to the gas station, pulled up to the pump, got out, put the nozzle in the tank, and I could still see the line of cars I had been behind.

With a shot of gogo juice we headed to SC. We got behind a truck pulling a trailer. He was going slow too. We got to a passing zone and he swerved over and took up both lanes. Got back to a no passing zone and he pulled back over. When we got to a 4 lane I passed him. It was my ex-wifes little brother. He had no idea what I drive he was just being a jerk like always. I wanted to run him off in a ditch.

We got to SC where the bas is 30 cents cheaper and pulled into a station. I told Steph to give me the gas money – she had not cashed the check in spite of the fact that she had gone past the bank no less than 5 times in 2 days. I put $100 in it and didn't fill it up. I didn't want to dip into my play fund too much.

We hit the interstate and shot up to Charlotte to sell the radiators – the yard I sell them too now closes at 330 instead of 430.

So we went across town to the guy who buys my catalytic converters. He wound up buying my rads too.

After a couple of minutes of Bsing with him we wandered across Charlotte to a BB&T branch and she cashed the check. It was down town so there was no where for me to park. I stopped on the corner and she got out. Before the light turned green I watched a drug deal happen. I called her and told her to stay in the building till I came back around the block. After 2 laps she was out and we were gone again.

Stopped in Mooresville to eat at Chick-Fil-A and let Heath play a bit. Then headed up to SearsYellow's to drop off the Vanguard.

After letting Heath run around for about 45 minutes we loaded up and hit the blacktop headed to VA.

On the big road I set the trim tabs, closed the blast shields, and set controls for ludicrous speed. Just before we went plaid Heath woke up and we pulled off for gas.

The gas gauge said it had about 1/8 of a tank. Only managed to put 31 gallons in the 42 gallon tank. Not bad for a 364 mile run in something with an engine as big as most peoples cars.

Just shortly after midnight I backed the BueOx down the driveway in front of Stephs uncles 25 foot camper that will be our home for out visit.

Heath was wound up tighter than a banjo string. He played and ran back and forth till probably 130 till he wore himself out.

Today the Ox gets to rest and so do I.
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#799 KennyP ONLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 05:37 PM

Glad you made a safe trip! "Ludicrous speed", is that anything like Warp 1?



#800 NJKen OFFLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 05:49 PM

Glad you made a safe trip! "Ludicrous speed", is that anything like Warp 1?


Watch the movie "Space Balls" and you'll understand.
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#801 Walkinman1 OFFLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 06:32 PM

I know you don't know me yet but as of late I've been following this thread and your spaceballs references always get a laugh out of me.
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#802 WNYTractorTinkerer ONLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 06:50 PM

I know you don't know me yet but as of late I've been following this thread and your spaceballs references always get a laugh out of me.

It was his favorite movie?!?!  Mel Brooks rocks!!



#803 UncleWillie ONLINE  

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Posted May 15, 2013 - 10:11 PM

I got Spaceballs for my wife to watch a while back. She had never seen it. I thought she was going to hyperventilate laughing so hard.


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#804 olcowhand ONLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 08:22 AM

I got Spaceballs for my wife to watch a while back. She had never seen it. I thought she was going to hyperventilate laughing so hard.

 

You know, I've never seen it.  I'll have to see if it's on Netflix.



#805 NJKen OFFLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 09:17 AM



I got Spaceballs for my wife to watch a while back. She had never seen it. I thought she was going to hyperventilate laughing so hard.


You know, I've never seen it. I'll have to see if it's on Netflix.


If you like corny humor, then you'll like it Daniel.

Another classic is "The Jerk" with Steve Martin.

#806 Walkinman1 OFFLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 09:32 AM

Having seen star wars helps too because then you understand what they're spoofing...
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#807 olcowhand ONLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 10:42 AM

Having seen star wars helps too because then you understand what they're spoofing...

 

Seen maybe all the Star Wars adventures, so the force will be with me.



#808 daytime dave OFFLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 12:21 PM

Good luck with Spaceballs Daniel.  It is one funny spoof.  Don't eat or drink during it, it will come out your nose for sure.



#809 UncleWillie ONLINE  

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Posted May 16, 2013 - 11:30 PM

It was a long day for the hat. Fun but long.

 

Yesterday consisted of sleeping, watching TV, and drinking coffee until 330 when we left for the dreaded monster-in-law visit. Took us an hour to get there. When we arrived her fiance was already three sheets to the wind. And he wanted to drive to the restaurant. I had one beer and he wanted me to have more. I kept telling him no.

 

We got to the restaurant and it was packed. I know why. IT was some good pizza. MILs fiance ordered a pitcher of beer. I had one glass. He drank the rest. I guess if I lived with her I would drink like that too.

 

Anyhow we got back to Steph's Uncles house at 930 went in and talked with him and his wife and then went to bed.

 

 

I got up this morning, got dressed, and left. Got two miles down the road and turned around and came back to get my wallet. Then I went back down the road and got coffee.

 

Hit the interstate and pushed it up to hyperspeed and made my way to LittleDeere's.

 

I pulled into his driveway exactly when I told him I would. He met me on the road and I followed him to his shop. And oh what a shop it is.

 

There are tractors everywhere. Unfortunately they have all developed some kind of mold and they are all green. He needs to look into that.

 

He had to go back to work so I saddled up and headed up towards SupraBens address. I had about 4 hours to make the one hour drive so I took my time.

 

I stopped at a little gas station/deli and got a hotdog. The gal who worked there wrote and book and had it for sale so I bought a copy and she autographed it to Steph. I read the first chapter it seems pretty good. I don't recall the title off the top of my head.

 

So I pointed myself back in SupraBens direction and got to some little town at an intersection where I had to turn left. In front of me was a white car sitting and in front of it was an old Dodge pickup. Beside th pickup was a guy who looked really upset. I thought there had been a wreck until the white car pulled away and the Dodge was sitting on its drivers rear brake drum. The guy walked over to a tire in the median and struggled to pick it up. I stopped and asked if he had a jack. He said yes but it was under his load of firewood and he had just had back surgery. So I grabbed my floor jack off the trailer and slid it under his axle.

 

Poor guy was so upset he was almost crying. He said he had just spent his last dollar to put air in the tire because he thought that was the reason the truck was wobbling. Then the tire fell off. He said he didn't have money to fix the truck. I told he we could take one lug nut off the other 3 wheels and he would be good to get home. He had worked third shift got off work at 8 and went to get firewood. It was about 130 in the afternoon so he was pretty tired. I know that feeling.

 

I got one lug off the front tire and as I went around the other side he decided to put the lug on the back. He buggered the threads. When I got to the other back tire all 5 lugnuts were loose on it. SO I took 2 nuts off it and went around to the drivers side. I took my pocket knife and cleaned the aluminum from the wheel off the studs and put his tire on for him. He told me he couldn't pay me. I explained that I didn't stop to make money I stopped to help him out. He hugged me. Then he tried to give me his tools and everything else in his truck. I refused.

 

We were both turning left and I had to follow him for about 6 miles. They whole way he was waving and thanking me out the window. When he turned on his road he leaned all the way out the window and waved with both hands. Made my day.

 

I got to Ben’s town about 2 ½ hours ahead of schedule so I had some time to kill. I went to a little town called BridgeWater and had a really good BBQ sandwich. Then I went to the Natural Chimney State park and watched some college kids play Frisbee. Two really cute girls too. I sat and talked with them for a little bit then it was time to head to Ben’s.

 

His mom met me in the driveway and ti turns out that they used to live in Gastonia, NC. Imagine that.

 

I gawked at his tractors and we chatted for a bit then I made the 2 ½ hour drive back to Mechanicsville.

 

When I came in Heath was glad to see me. He was very tired though since ti was past his bed time. We sat and talked with Stephs family and now I am in the camper in bed. Tonight her very liberal grandparents are flying in so tomorrow should be fun. I think we need to have a clay pigeon shoot on the back deck.


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#810 DougT ONLINE  

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Posted May 17, 2013 - 12:12 AM

Good Luck, Willie!!!






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